Exceptions (Levi x Reader)
by RivailleNel
Summary: [Y/N] got on with her life being in the Survey Corps. She promised herself that she will never love again after her last, until Levi came along.
1. He Looks Nice Though

It was six in the morning. [Y/N] woke up from her sleep in her room. [Y/N] room wasn't that big but it's fine since she is alone there. She was a squad leader, same as Hanji, Mike and Erwin that time, and each squad leader has their own individual rooms.

The room is not too fancy though but it has a washroom with a sink, toilet, mirror and a shower. She got up from her bed, buttoned her faded red polo shirt and grabbed her Scouting Legion military jacket on the side table near her bed. She went to the washroom and splashed a bit of water to wash her face and she looked in the mirror.

'Another day of training again', she sighed as she tie her [H/L] [H/C] hair while looking at the mirror. 'Tch', she grunted as she wore her military jacket and left the room.

[Y/N] grabbed onto the railing and began to go downstairs toward the Mess Hall. She saw Hanji, Erwin and Mike already eating their breakfast there.

"Good morning, [Y/N].", Hanji greeted.

"Good morning to you too, Hanji.", she greeted as she sat along with them on the table.

After eating their meal, Erwin and Mike left quickly.

"Where are Erwin and Mike headed to?", [Y/N] asked.

"I heard they are going to check out some thugs in the Underground city in Wall Sina.", Hanji replied.

"Why?"

"They say, those thugs were causing a lot of trouble down there."

"Tch, good for nothing thugs.", she murmured.

"Jeez [Y/N], loosen up, why always so serious?", Hanji said as she placed her hand on [Y/N]'s shoulder. [Y/N] smirked.

"Anyway, why us, the Recon Corps are the ones sent to deal with them?, [Y/N] asked.

"Don't know. Anyways, we should train now.", Hanji said standing up. [Y/N] then also stood up and they went to their squads.

 **…** **Time Skip Brought to You By [Y/N]'s Seriousness…**

The next day, the Recon Corps staffs were summoned to a meeting. Keith, Erwin, Hanji and [Y/N] were a part of it. The room was quiet.

"This is humiliating! Enrolment of recruits is conducted after the training course. You want to add them to our ranks and just piss on the rules?", [Y/N] grunted.

"If there are any objections, don't hesitate.", Keith said.

"They joined us because we threatened them. How will I explain this to the subordinates?", [Y/N] mumbled furrowing her eyebrows.

"Leader [Y/N], I understand you perfectly. Currently, they don't have any training that may cause concerns for some time. But certainly, they will be a key part of the reform.", Erwin said.

[Y/N] thought for a while. "A key part of the reform? I hope that the expedition outside the walls does not become their greatest crime.", [Y/N] assumed displeased.

After the meeting, the soldiers were then summoned to the courtyard. Keith walked out onto the podium and asked the three thugs to follow him.

"Attention! From now on, these three will fight alongside with you." Keith looked at the three thugs. "You three, introduce yourselves to your fellow soldiers."

The short one with raven black hair in the middle looked first at Erwin then introduced himself in annoyance. "Levi."

' _What the hell is his problem… Anyway, he looks nice though._ ' [Y/N] thought with a sudden smile trying to show on her face and a slight blush on her cheeks. She looked down and suddenly realized what was going on with her, quickly changing her aura in annoyance. ' _The fuck was I thinking_.'

The girl with red hair then introduced herself, so as the blonde guy.

Seeing what happened suddenly to [Y/N], Hanji then pushes her elbow to mine. "Yiee, what was that [Y/N]? I thought I saw you blush for a while.", Hanji whispered, teasing [Y/N].

"What? Why the hell would I blush? I don't even know that happens.", [Y/N] whispered with irritation trying to deny what happened to her a while ago.

While they were arguing silently, Keith announce on who's squad the three thugs is going to be. Hanji and [Y/N] weren't listening, so Keith spoke louder.

"They will stay on [L/N]'s squad! [Y/N]! Take care of them."

Hanji and [Y/N] stopped arguing.

"In my squad?!", [Y/N] replied, in shock.

"Do you object?", Keith asked.

"No, I just thought they would join Erwin's squad."

"Captain Erwin is working on a new formation for the next expedition. He entrusted the new recruits to you. You will now be responsible for their training. Is that understood?"

"Yes! Understood!", [Y/N] saluted and looked at Erwin, being displeased.

"That's all. Each squad should provide a standard report."

 **…** **Time Skip Brought to You by [Y/N]'s New Squad Members…**

[Y/N] is now showing the new recruits to their rooms.

"This is the squad barracks.", [Y/N] said as if she was bored.

"Yay, does that mean we live together?", the red haired girl exclaimed.

"Women live separately.", [Y/N] responded.

"Ehh, but I'm fine here!", the red haired girl argued.

"Don't argue, Isabel!", the blonde man scolded.

"Why are you so boring?", Isabel scowled.

"Don't call me that!", Farlan, the blonde man replied.

"You will sleep here.", [Y/N] pointed out the double bunk bed.

The short black haired guy, Levi then went near the bed and rubbed his fingers under the beds.

 _'_ _What the hell is this man doing, is he a clean-freak or what?_ ', [Y/N] thought to herself.

"You lived in underground sewers so much that you're probably used to the dirt. But here, you have cleanliness and order.", [Y/N] explained.

"What did you just say?", Levi replied in a furious tone.

[Y/N] did not know what to react. Levi then walked towards her. [Y/N] felt her heartbeat go faster. ' _The fuck is this I'm feeling, I believe he's mad. Why the fuck am I feeling this_.' [Y/N] thought with panic in her eyes as Levi gets close to her.

"You bastard! What did you say?", Levi hollered at [Y/N].

[Y/N] got even more confused because of the weird feelings she is experiencing right now. Usually, she is always grumpy and rude to everyone but now, she's having trouble on how she would react to this guy. [Y/N] looked tensed.

Farlan then went in between [Y/N] and Levi. "Don't worry captain! We'll keep the place clean.", Farlan assured, saluting wrong.

[Y/N] then recovered and her face turned to her usual blank expression. "Okay, if you finish unpacking, go to the training grounds.", [Y/N] said. "And Farlan, come with me, I'll teach you first the correct salute." [Y/N] then left with Farlan.


	2. None of Your Business

After that first day of training, [Y/N] felt tired. She then went off the Mess Hall to eat. She sat with Hanji who was there too.

"So [Y/N], how was the new recruits?", Hanji eagerly asked.

"A fucking delight!", [Y/N] exclaimed.

"Well, I'm sure it is because you finally found someone that will make your heart soft.", Hanji teased.

[Y/N] suddenly cough at what Hanji just said. "What?! Make my heart soft what?! I told you, what you saw in the courtyard, it's nothing. You know me, I don't give a shit for anyone, especially to those damn thugs.", [Y/N] explained blankly.

"Yeah, yeah, we'll see happens.", Hanji said, still a bit teasing.

'Tch', [Y/N] hissed, somewhat annoyed. She then continued eating her food.

After eating, [Y/N] went to her room to change. She removed her military jacket, her belt, and un-tucked her polo. She lied down on her bed and stared at the ceiling for a while.

' _Was I really having feelings for that short guy? Seriously? Of all people, why him? Why a criminal? Why this time, when I'm already a soldier? Why in this world?_ '. [Y/N] wandered over her deep thoughts.

"Ugh!", she grunted un frustration. ' _Maybe I'm just overreacting this. Yeah, that's right. I couldn't have feelings. No way. I'm just thinking too much. I'll just have to shake this thought off my mind_ '

[Y/N] stood from the bed and went outside her room. It was quiet. Everyone should be asleep by now. She then walked over the halls and went to the roof top. She sat there and gaze at the beautiful night sky filled with stars. It was peaceful. She thought this would be able to shake things off her mind.

After a few minutes of stargazing, someone sat behind her. She didn't bother to look whoever it was, she was busy looking at the stars.

"Whoa, it's beautiful.", the person behind him said in a low tone.

[Y/N] knew that voice. It was familiar. She then looked at the face of the person behind her. It was Levi. She felt her blood rushing again and her face started to blush a bit, so she looked away.

"So it is.", [Y/N] said trying to sound emotionless for Levi not to notice her blushing. "Anyway, I'm sorry."

"Sorry for what?", Levi asked, staring at the stars.

"For that clean thing,", [Y/N] answered.

"Oh,". It was silent. The two just gazed at the stars for while.

"Anyway, why are you here?", [Y/N] asked.

"I woke up by the sound of someone walking along the halls, so I decided to check whoever it was and what it was up to.", Levi replied along with a blank expression. Levi and [Y/N] were kind of alike.

"Oh, sorry for that.", [Y/N] responded.

"How about you? Why are you here?", Levi asked, looking at you.

"Just trying to shake something off my mind.", [Y/N] said, not looking into his eyes and trying to sound as uncaring as possible.

"So what's that?"

"What's what?"

"What are you trying to get off your mind?"

"It's… None of your business, cadet.", [Y/N] suddenly replied in a strict voice.

It was again silent. It has been an hour of staring at stars for the two of you. [Y/N] started to feel sleepy. So she stood up.

"Aren't you going to sleep cadet? We have training early tomorrow.", [Y/N] asked, as she was about to go down. Levi then stood up and followed [Y/N]. They both went back to their own rooms.

… **Time Skip** …

The next day, Isabel, Farlan, Levi were eating breakfast in the Mess Hall.

"So guys, what do you think of our Squad Leader?", Isabel asked the two.

"I think she was nice, in spite of her always blank expression, just like Levi.", Farlan exclaimed and somewhat blushing, he added, "And she is really pretty."

"Yeah, she is pretty and she seems nice. Her expression is just the same as bro.", Isabel seconded.

"Tch. We have nothing alike. I don't like her guts even if she seemed nice to me last night." Levi said.

"What? You got to hang out with her last night?", Farlan asked as if he was kind of jealous because she somewhat admired [Y/N].

"Are you jealous, Farlan? Aren't you glad the Levi is now dating someone.", Isabel exclaimed teasingly.

"What? We're not dating. I never said that. I just happened to stumble upon her last night. It wasn't even that long.", Levi explained with annoyance in his face.

[Y/N] suddenly came to their table where they were eating. [Y/N] decided to eat with her new squad members. The three suddenly stopped talking.

"Why did you stop talking? Was I interrupting something?", [Y/N] asked, somewhat curious.

"Uhh, no, captain. We were just talking about how… how pretty you were.", Farlan shyly said, slightly blushing as he scratches his head.

Levi rolled his eyes.

"Yes, we were just talking about that. You really are pretty, captain.", Isabel added.

[Y/N] started to slightly blush even with her blank expression. "Well, thank you then." [Y/N] didn't know what to respond so she just went on and munched to eat her food.

It was awkwardly silent as the four eat.

"So captain, Levi-bro said you hung out with him last night.", Isabel said.

Levi glared at Isabel because he didn't really say it that way. [Y/N] got shocked a bit, knowing that maybe they were talking about it before she got there.

"Uhh… We didn't really hang out. He just happened to saw me there and we both liked the view." [Y/N] said in an emotionless tone.

"So what happened?", Isabel curiously asked, Levi still glaring at her.

"Well, I was stargazing. Levi found me. He joined me stargazing too. That was it.", [Y/N] tried to explain it as simple as possible.

"Whoa, that's kind of… romantic.", Isabel sighed.

[Y/N] suddenly choked on the food she was eating because of what Isabel said. Levi slightly stepped on Isabel's foot because he knew Isabel was talking too much. Isabel tried not to react on what Levi did.

"Squad leader, are you okay?", Farlan asked, concerned.

[Y/N] drank a glass of water and tried to calm down from choking. "Yeah, yeah, I'm fine.". She inhaled a lot of air and then exhaled. "So, I think we should train now."


	3. Deep Sleep

After the training, [Y/N] was dead tired as usual. She's off to the Mess Hall again. She decided to eat with Hanji. She didn't want to hear Isabel's assumptions.

"You seem fucked up today, [Y/N].", Hanji presumed.

"Uhh, you don't say. I just want some fucking rest.", [Y/N] grunted.

"Well, maybe if the new recruits were placed in my squad, I would be as dead tired as you are now.", Hanji said.

"They are actually good in training though, but their attitudes... Uhh. That's the fucking highlight.", [Y/N] murmured.

"Heheh, you'll get used to it, like you always do." Hanji said as she pats your back. "Hence, this time, you even have an inspiration."

"Fuck you, Hanji.", [Y/N] said giving a death glare to Hanji, but she was too tired to argue more so she just continued to eat her food.

"Anyway, I heard we will have an expedition anytime soon within the next few months. I'm so excited. I'm gonna see a Titan again!", Hanji exclaimed joyfully.

"Tch. You're the only one who gets aroused by a Titan in here.", [Y/N] teased.

"Ahh. Soon, I'm going to catch one alive so I could experiment!", Hanji said. "I hope someday they would agree on this goal of mine…"

Hanji kept blabbering about catching a titan and experimenting it to [Y/N] the whole evening. Hanji didn't notice that [Y/N] had already fallen asleep. Hanji tried to wake her up but she really was dead tired and she was deep already in her sleep. So she tried to carry her to her bed, but she was damn heavy, in spite of [Y/N] being just 5'4 in height. She then called out someone to help her carry [Y/N]. She looked around the Mess Hall and she saw the new recruits.

"Hey you! You're Levi right?", Hanji called the short black haired man.

"Uh-huh.", Levi nodded.

"Help me carry Squad Leader [Y/N] to her room. She seems to be deep asleep and she's damn heavy", Hanji ordered as she was already holding [Y/N]'s one arm on her shoulder.

Levi then approached them and he picked up [Y/N] bridal style. Hanji was shocked because it seems like [Y/N]'s weight is not heavy for Levi's strength. Well, for a short man like Levi, it was hard to believe that he was that strong.

"Tch. Where is her room?", Levi hesitated because Hanji was taking too long to respond.

"Oh, sorry. This way.", Hanji adjusted her glasses, then leading Levi towards [Y/N]'s room.

 **–** **Levi's POV –**

 _'_ _She's quite heavy. Why isn't she waking up even a bit. Hm, maybe she's dead tired from training.'_ I continued following Hanji as I carry [Y/N] and she's really deep asleep. I decided to examine her features.

 _'_ _Her eyes, it's so pretty though… Yes, she does have that blank expression all the time like she has no emotions. But she did have emotions, last night, when I talked to her. Even if it's just a small talk, she seemed to care but she tries to hide it… What could be the reason for her to mask her true emotions, a tragic back story, perhaps? I wonder what happened… Wait, then we are a bit alike.'_ I looked straight the hallway, suddenly realizing something as I think about [Y/N]. I glance at [Y/N]'s face once again. _'Isabel and Farlan was right. She really is pretty. Hm. No doubt about that.'_ I then furrowed my eyebrows and looked to where I was walking again. _'The fuck was I thinking.'_

"We are here.", Hanji said, opening the door of [Y/N]'s room for me.

I walked inside and I was quite impressed on how pristine her room was. Her room even smelled like flowers, just like [Y/N]'s scent. I then place [Y/N] on her bed and covered her with some sheets so she wouldn't get cold.

"Thanks for the help, Levi.", Hanji greeted me with a silly smile on her face. I nod at her and then left the room.

 **…** **Time Skip …**

– Normal POV –

The next day, it was six in the morning. [Y/N] opened her eyes and stretched her arms as she had a good night's sleep. She held on the sheet covering her and the she realized she was still wearing her full uniform.

 _'_ _What? I didn't change my clothes since last night? Wait, I don't even remember getting to bed last night… I just remember I was listening to Hanji talk about how she wanted to experiment on Titans and that's about it. What happened after that? The fuck. Now, I'm in my bed in my room, covered with sheets.'_ [Y/N] tried to remember how did she get to her room last night. She really can't remember, she decided to just ask Hanji later.

She then stood up from bed, removed all her clothes then took a quick shower.

After showering and dressing up, she went downstairs to the Mess Hall, quickly approaching Hanji.

"Hey, [Y/N], how's your sleep?", Hanji greeted.

"It was great though, but I don't remember how I got to my room last night. The last thing I remember was you blabbering about Titans. So, I thought maybe you know what happened.", [Y/N] asked.

"Oh, I thought so, you will ask. Prince charming carried you, sleeping beauty, to your bed last night.", Hanji teased.

"Prince charming? What? Fuck, Hanji. I have no time to fool around.", [Y/N] grumbled as if she was getting furious.

"Okay, okay, calm down. I asked Levi to help me carry you to bed last night.", Hanji explained.

"What?", [Y/N]'s cheeks suddenly had a dash of red but she tried to hide it from Hanji. "Why did you ask him? Can't you carry me by yourself?"

"I tried but your damn heavy [Y/N]. I'm surprised that short man can carry you without even a hint of suffering.", Hanji exclaimed.

"Suffering, huh? I'm not that heavy. You're just weak, Hanji.", [Y/N] teased back in her blank expression.

"Yeah, yeah, but you'll thank me sooner or later.", Hanji said with a grin on her face.

"The fuck was that supposed to mean?", [Y/N] scolded Hanji.

"You'll see." Hanji responded, still with that grin smile.

[Y/N] just smirked at her. She then grabs some food and went to her squad's table.

"Good morning Squad Leader [Y/N].", Farlan greeted as [Y/N] sat with them.

"Good morning, Farlan.", [Y/N] greeted back with a little hint of smile on her face.

"You seem to be happy today, captain.", Isabel said teasingly.

"What? I'm not. I'm like this everyday.", [Y/N] denied.

"It's different, captain. You're different today.", Isabel explained.

"Well, maybe you're right, maybe you're wrong, Isabel.", [Y/N] said calmly as she started to eat her food.

Levi then looked at [Y/N] and it really seems that her aura is different today. [Y/N] felt that someone was looking at her as she was eating so she looked around. Levi averted his eyes quickly and [Y/N] did not see him look at her. They all just continued to eat because they were going to train again.

In the courtyard, [Y/N] gathered her squad.

"Okay, today we train hand-to-hand combat, go find a spar.", [Y/N] announced.

Isabel and Farlan paired up. They started to combat. Only Levi was left without a spar.

"Oi, Levi, don't you have a partner yet?", [Y/N] asked.

"I don't.", Levi answered.

"Well, it's your lucky day brat, you get to train with me.", [Y/N] exclaimed.

"Tch. Let's see what you can do.", Levi hissed.

"G.", [Y/N] answered shifting to her fighting position; Levi changes his position as well. They began to go around each other.

[Y/N] started with punches on Levi's stomach, Levi was able to dodge all her attacks. Levi then attacked and threw punches to [Y/N], [Y/N] caught Levi's fist and [Y/N] kicked Levi's leg and he fell to the ground. [Y/N] then offered a hand to Levi.

"Not bad.", Levi said as he held on to [Y/N]'s hand, standing up.

"Not bad yourself too, brat.", [Y/N] responded as she poised herself into her fighting position again. "Another round?"

"Sure."

After several hours, [Y/N] squad finished their training. They were headed back inside the barracks.

"Oh, Levi, I forgot to thank you.", [Y/N] said as she tried to walk along beside Levi.

"For what?", Levi asked.

"Last night, Hanji said you carried me."

"Oh.", Levi just nodded and they headed on.


	4. Something Bad

The next days of training were a breeze. Isabel, Farlan and Levi were actually good, especially Levi.

In the courtyard, [Y/N] were watching the three new recruits train.

"Yahoo!", Isabel shouted riding off a horse. "Yeah!"

Isabel then zipped to a tree and called off her horse to land on.

"Come closer, horsie!", she said the horse went closer and she landed on its back. "Yeah! That's good!"

"That was impressive!", a blonde girl soldier looking at her suddenly spoke to her. "I didn't think you could learn to work with a horse so quickly."

"Underground, I always got along with animals.", Isabel said. "Humans were the worst so…"

"The captain and the rest speak poorly about those who lived in the underground city.", the blonde girl hesitated. "Was it hard to live there? Did you suffer?"

"Hmm… Yes", Isabel thought of her past life for a while. "I was born and raised in the city. I lived among the garbage, though that's obvious. When I was about to die, brother saved me and I became a little better as a person."

"Oh, you mean Levi?", the blonde girl said looking towards Levi.

"Yeah, my brother was the strongest person in city.", Isabel replied.

"Farlan too?", the blonde girl asked.

"Ahh! Farlan…", Isabel responded looking at Farlan sitting with someone on pile of logs.

"…Yes, he easily become it!", Farlan said talking to the dark haired guy sitting beside him. "And thanks to that, our group soon became known."

Farlan remembered their lives underground. "Since then, we have always followed him. It's not spoken aloud but Levi has always been considered the leader. We don't tell him this because we don't want to burden him."

"So he's good?", the dark haired guy beside him asked.

"Yeah, I wouldn't pick a fight with him.", Farlan answered grinning.

"Uh oh, looks like we have to get back to work.", the dark haired guy said standing up and looking at the window in the building. "Captain Erwin is looking at us."

Farlan looked also. "From that room?", he asked hesitantly.

"If we become important, we can also have our own room.", the dark haired guy replied. "Come on, let's get back to training."

Farlan was still looking at Erwin through the window until Erwin left. Farlan also went on.

…

[Y/N] was watching over Levi train as she lay back on a tree and her arms folded. Levi then grabbed on to his dual blades. [Y/N] noticed that Levi held the blades in a different way.

"Hey, you don't actually hold your weapon like that, right?", [Y/N] hollered over Levi. "They aren't wielded that way. Do you want to die during the first expedition?"

"Tch. Soon it will happen to you.", Levi murmured, still being quite rude.

[Y/N] thought she heard Levi said something against her. She furrowed her eye brows. "What did you just say?"

Levi looked back at [Y/N]. "It's only meant for cutting the back of a Titan's neck. Let me do what I think is comfortable."

[Y/N] silently hissed 'tch' and then replied. "Have it your way then."

[Y/N] then watched the three train, zipping and slicing necks. Levi caught her attention even more and she was surprised.

 _'_ _Whoa, he's way too fast. Is it from gripping the blade wrong?'_ , [Y/N] thought as she stared on Levi. _'No doubt, he is way better than the other soldiers that had been in the Survey Corps.'_

' _Tch_ ', [Y/N] realized she was staring way too long at Levi, she averted her eyes and also her thoughts. _'Part of the reform but should we accept them with open arms?'_

…

Their training was finished and [Y/N] went back to her room. Then, she saw Farlan walking along the hall where the squad leaders' rooms are.

"Cadet, what are you doing here?", [Y/N] asked as she opens the door of her room.

"Umm…", Farlan looked tensed as he scratch his head, thinking of an excuse. "I was just wandering around, captain, getting to know the place"

[Y/N] furrowed her eyebrows. "Tch. Okay, next time, don't go wandering around in here. These are the squad leaders' rooms. Next time you got caught around here, there will be punishments, cadet."

"Sorry captain. This will never happen again.", Farlan said still quite tensed.

"Now go! Scamper anywhere else but here.", [Y/N] ordered.

Farlan then quickly dashed away out from [Y/N]'s sight. [Y/N] then went on to her room and sat on her bed. She felt that Farlan was up to something. She just can't think of a reason why or what it is he was up to. Maybe, the three new recruits were planning something bad. She didn't know. She didn't know what happened back then when the three were underground. She wasn't sure, maybe Erwin knows.

 _'_ _Fuck it. I don't care.'_ [Y/N] throwing aside away the idea. She didn't want to get involved with them, or with anyone, anyway.

 **…** **TimeSkip…**

Several months later, on the day of the departure for the first expedition…

 _The gates opened._ _It was sunny and partly cloudy. [Y/N] was wearing her uniform and her Survey Corps cape is flowing along her back as she rode her horse. She was looking at the beautiful sky and the vast area covered with grass outside the walls._

 _Someone she knew was riding a horse too, beside her. He rode near her and kissed her cheeks. [Y/N] blushed._

 _The sky suddenly darkened as the clouds started to gather. The rain started pouring heavily and the surrounding became foggy. She can barely see anything._

 _As she rode off, she fell off the ground, she saw the guy who kissed her cheeks being chewed by a titan._

 _She suddenly saw flashes of that guy lying on the ground, terribly bleeding. [Y/N] felt tears rolling on her cheeks._

 _"_ _I love you [Y/N].", the guy said panting. "I want to see you happy."_

"Jeremy!", [Y/N] shouted, waking up from her dream, tears rolling on her cheeks and sweat all over her body.

' _Uhh, it's been a long time since I had that dream again. I don't want to remember that_.', [Y/N] said to herself as she rub her temples. _'Ugh, now I'm covered in sweat.'_

She then stood up, took her clothes off and showered.

It was the day of the expedition. Maybe that's why she had that dream. After preparing herself, she went off.

At the Shiganshina Southern Gate, as the soldiers on their horses awaits the gate to be opened.

"Open the Gates!", Keith hollered. "Today we will take another step forward! Let the results of your training show! Make them realize the strength of humanity!"

The gate is now opened. "Everyone! Go!", Keith commanded as the soldiers rode their horses forward.

"Hey, now would be the right time… Someone… Tell me this is all a lie.", Farlan said.

"Yeah, this really seems to good to be true.", Levi added as they rode off pass the wall gates. "That people from the underground are able to get outside the walls, that is."

"Amazing!", Isabel said, astounded by the view outside the walls.

"Not bad.", Levi agreed.

"Ha… This is the worst… We actually got outside the walls.", Farlan exclaimed.

"Don't worry. I'll deal with the titans somehow.", Levi said.

"No matter how many titans you face-", Farlan got cut off.

"Are you saying you don't trust me?", Levi grunted.

"No, no, that's not what I meant.", Farlan explained.

"Hehehe, are you scared Farlan?", Isabel teased.

"Hey, I'm not scared!", Farlan reasoned.

"Just leave it to me, Farlan.", Isabel boasted. "It will be easy. I'll get rid of those nasty titans for you."

"Why you…", Farlan mumbled.

"Quit messing around!", a soldier with a black hair shouted. "Titans are not as easy to fight as you think. Stop acting like this is a damn joke. Do you have any idea how many soldiers have been eaten by titans? You trash from the underground… Don't get so full of yourself."

"Hey, you can say whatever you want.", Isabel replied. "If I defeat a titan, everyone here will be the same level as that trash from underground."

"What did you just say!?", the black haired soldier said.

"Tch!", Levi hissed as he rode his horse near the black haired soldier.

"What do you want?", the black haired soldier asked Levi.

"Knock it off, Sayram!", [Y/N] hollered.

"But squad leader…", the black haired soldier reasoned.

"Calm down. Otherwise you will not be allowed to take part in the training of the new formations from now on.", [Y/N] explained. "Don't throw the formation out of order since we don't know when a titan is going to appear."

"Actual fighting is different from training, you know.", [Y/N] said to Levi.

Levi just glanced back at [Y/N] with his blank expression. It didn't matter how strong they were. It is on what will happen when they get to face the titans themselves.

A 20 meter titan suddenly appeared approaching them. It was an abnormal. Three soldiers came to fight it but they failed and they all died.

 _'_ _What are we supposed to do?!... with our current strength..!',_ [Y/N] thought to herself. _'No, we have to do it! Even if it costs us our lives…'_

"Sayram, follow me!", [Y/N] commanded but then she saw Levi. "You? What are you planning?"

"You said we shouldn't take those titans too lightly, didn't you?", Levi replied. "Then don't underestimate the way we fight either."

"Isabel, Farlan, let's go!", Levi yelled as they headed off to the titan.

"If I knew we would face this every time, sipping water from the gutter would be way better!", Farlan said.

"Farlan, stop saying that and get it together!", Isabel confronted.

"Wait, you three!" [Y/N] shouted as three still went on.

[Y/N] had nothing to do but to trust them. She watched over as Levi zipped to the back of the titan to distract it. Isabel and Farlan then sliced through the titan's legs so it would stop moving. When the titan had stopped moving, Levi then sliced the titan's nape, killing the titan.

 _'_ _Are you kidding me? He's… He's actually good.'_ [Y/N] was in awe of what Levi did.

"You were cool, big bro!", Isabel exclaimed to Levi.

"You guys did well too", Levi said.

[Y/N] had a hint of smile showing on her face as she looked at Levi, Isabel and Farlan. She was proud of the three no matter how much she despised them at first. But the cold hearted person she is, she refused to care and to get too attached.


	5. (YN)'s First Expedition

The soldiers went on to a run-down joint to rest there.

[Y/N] was walking the hallways then she saw Levi leaning against the wall, alone. Levi saw her.

"What are you doing here alone? Where are Isabel and Farlan?", [Y/N] asked, stopping for Levi.

"I'm waiting for them.", Levi answered.

"Well, you did really good in today's fight Levi. You even managed to take down an abnormal in your first battle.", [Y/N] said.

"Your teammates can rest easier knowing that they have someone as talented as you around.", [Y/N] said with glimmer in her eyes. There was a hint of smile showing in her usually blank expression. Levi saw it.

"…", Levi was quite astonished of the [Y/N]'s slight change in expression. He didn't know what to say. He just looked down.

[Y/N] averted her stare also and looked down. It was awkward until Isabel came. The glimmer on [Y/N]'s eyes were suddenly gone. She was back to her blank self.

"Big bro!", Isabel shouted waving her hand. "Sorry, that took longer that I thought. I'm done changing so you can come back now."

Levi then went towards Isabel and they went away.

 _'_ _Well, that was weird.',_ [Y/N] thought staring as the two went away.

"So, [Y/N]", Hanji said. "Your levi was very good, taking down that 20 meter abnormal."

"Excuse me, what's with the "your"?", [Y/N] mumbled leaning against the wall.

"Jeez, take a joke, [Y/N]", Hanji giggled putting her hands on [Y/N]'s shoulder. "I'll go talk to them."

"Okay. I'll head off to my room now.", [Y/N] said as they both part ways.

Hanji headed off to Isabel, Farlan and Levi who were talking.

"Hey you, can I disturb you for a moment?", Hanji asked to the three. "I saw it you know, that decisive moment."

"The decisive moment?", Levi asked. The three all looked so tensed.

"What am I talking about?", Hanji hesitated. "It's obvious that I'm talking about the moment when you brought down that titan!"

"That was really amazing!", Hanji exclaimed. "I was overwhelmed with excitement!"

The three looked relieved now.

"I'm Hanji Zoe, by the way. Levi here already knows me." Hanji said winking at Levi. "This girl, over here, is Isabel right?"

Hanji sat down in between Isabel and Farlan. She then pointed to Farlan. "And.. This is..."

"Farlan", Farlan said.

"Right right, Farlan! Nice to meet you.", Hanji exclaimed tapping Farlan's shoulder.

"You didn't come from the training corps right?", Hanji asked Levi. "How are you sao skilled with the 3DMG?"

"…", Levi didn't answer.

"Be sociable.", Farlan whispered to Levi.

"I practiced. Nothing special.", Levi answered.

"Did you learn form anyone? The first time I tried it, I had a hard time balancing myself on the belts.", Hanji said. "Do you have any tricks for improving?"

The three looked annoyed at her.

"Man! You don't mince words huh? You're a lot like [Y/N]…", Hanji wavered. "Even a tiny hint would be great."

"Everyone saw how you fought. The way you fight encourages us to believe that humanity will not lose to the titans.", Hanji explained. "It was really awe-inspiring to watch you fight. So by all means…"

"Hehehe, we are amazing aren't we? They're thinking better of us? Did you get a good look?", Isabel said being all excited.

"Yep, it was awesome.", Hanji agreed. "This is exactly why Levi should…"

"Big bro is the strongest one out there! Even underground, he was he strongest!", Isabel exclaimed.

"Really now? I'd love to know the secret to his strength you know.", Hanji said.

"Big bro is um… Um…", Isabel hesitated. "Anyways, he's strong!"

"Here, Isabel, would you like to try some of this sweets I got from [Y/N]?", Hanji said handing over a pouch full of candy to Isabel.

"So how about it? Would you be willing to let us know what goes on inside your head?", Hanji asked to Levi.

"I can't.", Levi answered. "I'm self-taught. It's not something that you can easily teach to others."

"But…", Hanji hesitated.

"Sorry, I'm exhausted.", Levi reasoned.

"I see.", Hanji replied with disappointment in her face. "I'm sorry for disturbing you."

"Thank you, Isabel. Thank you, Farlan.", Hanji said standing up, about to leave. "Let's have a nice long chat next time okay?"

"Wait!", Isabel said, grabbing Hanji's wrist. "You seem pretty close to our squad leader. I wanted to ask why… Why is Squad Leader [Y/N] like that?"

"Yes, we're pretty close. We're from the same batch.", Hanji looked back to the three. "What do you mean, Isabel?"

"She seems really nice but suddenly she becomes cold hearted and uncaring.", Isabel said.

"Oh.", Hanji adjusted her glasses. "You know, she's really sweet, kind and caring before. But everything changed after our first expedition outside the walls here in the Survey Corps."

"What happened?", Farlan asked.

"Her loved one died on our first expedition outside the walls. She wasn't able to save him in time.", Hanji answered in a low tone. "After that, she became the cold hearted person she is now."

"Oh…", Isabel replied quite sad a bit for the tragic story.

"So, that was just about it.", Hanji said bringing back her smile and waving as she was leaving them. "I'll leave the three of you then."

"Boy, Squad Leader was sweet and nice before?", Isabel said. "I can't imagine."

"Well, like you said. Her side of being nice shows sometimes no matter how hard she try not to care at all.", Farlan said.

"What's the point of being with someone in this world, mostly when you two are both soldiers and you know that one of you could die sooner or later?", Levi said.

"Well, Levi, if you fall in love, you fall in love. There's no stopping it.", Farlan answered. "Maybe this world is cruel, but those things make it beautiful. It gives you the reason to go on."

"Tch", Levi hissed. He realized that it was true. Well, he did care for his friends, Farlan and Isabel. Levi didn't want to admit but he also did care for [Y/N] who maybe sometimes unpredictably rude but really is nice. [Y/N] was patient with them in spite her cold hearted mask which Levi admires but denies it. Thus, caring for them, it was a reason for him to fight.

 **…** **Flashback…**

It was sunny and partly cloudy. [Y/N] was wearing her uniform and her Survey Corps cape is flowing along her back as she rode her horse. She was astounded by the view of the outside world for the first time she has seen it. The sky, so blue, trees and grass fields everywhere. The world was huge, she thought that time. She was amazed that beneath the walls, it wasn't all hell. It was something worth more, something worth fighting for.

'This is nice.', [Y/N] thought to herself, looking at the sky, closing her eyes and feeling the wind against her skin.

"[Y/N]! Don't get too cocky. We're not strolling in the park.", Jeremy hollered, catching [Y/N]'s attention.

"Can't you just appreciate the view?", [Y/N] chuckled.

"I am. Look.", Jeremy said staring at [Y/N] as [Y/N] looked at him. "And I actually like the view".

"Oh, stop it you.", [Y/N] blushed a bit as she knew what Jeremy meant.

Jeremy rode his horse closer to [Y/N] and kissed her on the cheek and whispered, "I love you, [Y/N]".

"I love you too, brat.", [Y/N] said looking at Jeremy's eyes.

"Hey, you two, stop fucking around.", Hanji said teasing Jeremy and [Y/N].

"You'll find someone, Hanji.", Jeremy teased.

Suddenly, the sky darkened. The clouds started to gather. Heavy drops of rain started to pour. The surrounding became foggy and they can barely see anything. The signals weren't advisable to use anymore.

"Shit. This is really bad.", [Y/N] said.

"What should we do?", Hanji asked slightly panicking.

"We move forward I guess, and hope that this heavy rain would stop sooner.", Jeremy said.

The three headed off, until they came across a 5 meter class titan. [Y/N] fell to the ground from her horse as she did not see that she was approaching the titan's foot. She was in shock, it was their first time to see a titan. She just froze there on the ground. The 5 meter titan grabbed her and she was going to be eaten.

Suddenly, the titan fell down, and [Y/N] got off from the titan's grasp. The 5 meter titan was killed. It was killed by Jeremy. [Y/N] was still in shock, Hanji grabbed her quickly.

"Let's g–", Hanji got cut off as she saw that there was another titan, a 7 meter class one and it grabbed Jeremy.

"No!", Hanji then grabbed her blades and zipped into the titans back as fast as she could. She tried to cut the titan's nape but she didn't hit the correct spot. The titan swung his arms and Hanji got hit. Hanji got knocked out. [Y/N] has been frozen and watching what has been happening to her loved one and her friend.

 _'_ _Why can't I move? I was one of the top ten in our ranks and I couldn't do a damn thing_ ', [Y/N] thought as tears started rolling to her cheeks. She was frightened. She saw the titan putting Jeremy on his mouth and Hanji, hanging on the back of the titan, unconscious. She could hear Jeremy screaming in pain as he was being chewed by the titan. At that frightening moment, she thought to herself. _'Humans are weak... I've come this far… with him, along the way… Was crying all that I can do?'_. [Y/N] felt her blood rushing to her veins. She regained control of herself.

"No!", [Y/N] snapped out of it with tears still flowing from her eyes. She grabbed her blades and zipped through the titans back. She sliced the nape of the titan. She did it. She grabbed Hanji and placed her on the horse. She ran toward Jeremy, his waist bleeding excessively from the titans bite.

"Shit.", [Y/N] cried as she tried to patch up Jeremy's wound.

"D-don't cry my dear…", Jeremy panted as he raise his hand to wipe [Y/N]'s tears. "I-I don't want to see you like this…"

"The bleeding won't stop... Please, why won't the bleeding stop", [Y/N] whimpered harder, panicking.

"I-I l-love you [Y/N]… P-please don't c-cry.", Jeremy gasped as he still try to wipe her tears and shut her mouth. "I-I want to remember you h-happy, n-not like this."

"I love you too, Jeremy", [Y/N] sobbed trying her best to stop herself from crying, for Jeremy's sake. She tried her best to put a smile but the she could not keep away the tears.

"T-that's more like it.", Jeremy smiled as he caressed [Y/N]'s cheek and pulled [Y/N] in for a hug. [Y/N] then hugged back with tears still flowing. She then felt Jeremy's grab on her loosen. She looked at Jeremy's face, his eyes were now closed and his face looks like as if he was in peace. She then placed her head on his chest, he wasn't breathing anymore.

"No.. No!", [Y/N] screamed and she cried even harder. She lied her head on Jeremy's chest, sobbing.

Hanji then regained her consciousness. She saw [Y/N] crying over Jeremy. She came near [Y/N] and placed her hand on [Y/N]'s back.

"I'm sorry.", Hanji said sincerely.

[Y/N] then looked at Hanji and hugged her tight. [Y/N] cried even more and Hanji patted [Y/N]'s back.

 **…** **End of Flashback…**


	6. Shitty Feelings

It was back to normal days of training again. They were training hand to hand combat again. This time, [Y/N] will try to combat with the three of them: Isabel, Farlan and Levi. Isabel had gone first.

"Ready?", [Y/N] said poised in her fighting position.

"Bring it on, captain.", Isabel boasted also in her fighting position and she tries to make a move.

In just a glimpse, Isabel was lying already in the ground, falling on her butt.

"Aw.", Isabel said standing up, rubbing her slightly aching butt as [Y/N] offered her hand to help her.

"Farlan, you're next.", [Y/N] said signalling Farlan to go near her.

"Uhh… Okay captain.", Farlan looked quite scared.

"Don't be scared, Farlan.", [Y/N] said as she make her move. With the same fate as Isabel, Farlan already had fallen to the ground, he didn't even got a chance to make a move on [Y/N].

"You're really good with this, squad leader.", Farlan stood up with the help of [Y/N].

"Levi, you're up.", [Y/N] said as Levi went towards her. "Let's see if you can beat me this time."

"Tch, I'll beat you this time.", Levi said poised in his fighting position.

[Y/N] then starts to make a move. She tries to kick Levi's leg, but Levi dodged it. Levi held [Y/N]'s chin to push her away. [Y/N] being distracted, Levi kicks [Y/N]'s legs and she lost her balance. Levi pins [Y/N] to the ground.

"I beat you now.", Levi said as he was on top on [Y/N], staring at her.

They were so close. They were almost breathing on each other's breathe. It was suddenly so hot. Isabel and Farlan just stared at the two of them, being so close.

 _'He's… He's so… handsome… He smells so nice too.'_ [Y/N] thought as she was staring on Levi pinning her. She cheeks were suddenly dusted with pink. _'We… we're so close.'_

Levi's eyes widen as he saw [Y/N] blush. He saw again the glimmer in [Y/N]'s eyes. _'Why is she looking like these at me?'_ , Levi thought.

After a few seconds of staring at each other and being so close, it became awkward for Isabel and Farlan who were just staring at them.

"Umm... Squad leader?.. Levi?..", Farlan said catching the attention of the two.

Levi then stood up and helped [Y/N] to stand.

"Uhh… You did good today, Levi.", [Y/N] said trying to snap out of it, from that awkward moment that just happened.

[Y/N] tried to go back to her cold hearted stature.

"Okay, resume training now. I forgot that I have some paperwork to do, so…", [Y/N] ordered as she left the three.

The three were left in the field. Isabel and Farlan looked at Levi. Isabel bumped her elbows on Levi.

"Big bro and squad leader have something going on.", Isabel teased.

"There's nothing going on, Isabel.", Levi said in a serious tone.

"Well, with the looks of it, there is. Maybe you like her, Levi.", Farlan said teasing. "Or maybe she likes you, or maybe even better, the both of you."

""Stop it. I don't like her, you moron", Levi grunted.

The two just chuckled as if they didn't believe what he said.

"Tch. Let's get back to training now.", Levi grumbled changing the subject.

…

[Y/N] was in her room. She didn't have some paperwork to do. She just needed some air to think. What happened to her and Levi was awkward. She open the drawers next to her bed to get something, it was an expedition badge. She held the expedition badge, it was of Jeremy's.

 _'I couldn't possibly have feelings for him.'_ [Y/N] thought to herself holding the expedition badge. _'I… I can't...'_

 **…Flashback…**

The Survey Corps got back from the tragic expedition.

[Y/N] got the expedition badge of Jeremy as a remembrance of him. She was standing there, staring at the burning fire where the bones of the soldiers who died were being burned.

 _'What should be done now? I don't know what to feel anymore. All my dreams with him, shattered into bits and pieces. What should I do?',_ her grip on Jeremy's expedition badge tightened. _'Someone… Tell me… What should I do now?'_

Tears started to flow on [Y/N]'s cheeks. She was hopeless. Then she remembered what Jeremy's last words to her. _'Don't cry. I wan't you remember you happy.'_ Those were Jeremy's words. _'How can I be happy now that you are gone?! Jeremy… Why did you leave me? Why did you leave me in this goddamn awful place?!'_ [Y/N] cried even more. Suddenly, someone's hand was on her shoulder.

"[Y/N], I-I'm really sorry.", Hanji said. "He was a great guy."

[Y/N], with tears in her eyes, looked at Hanji. _'Why are humans so weak?.. Why am I so weak? Why… is this world so cruel?'_ [Y/N] thought looking back to the fire. _'These feelings… These feelings, makes us all weak! In this world, one shouldn't have feelings… One could not love in this horrible awful place.'_

"I-I will… never care for anyone again.", [Y/N] said with a hurting angry expression. "I… I… I will never love again!"

Hanji just stared at [Y/N] saying those words

"[Y/N]?", Hanji asked, concerned for [Y/N].

[Y/N] then wiped off her tears and put on a straight face. She left the room.

That was the day when [Y/N] had changed.

 **..End of Flashback…**

 _'Yep. I can't. Not in this world. I've already learned my lesson… Jeremy.'_ [Y/N] made up her mind. She then placed the badge back to the drawers next to her bed.

….

Sometime prior to the expedition to departure, Erwin was discussing about the new formation he planned.

"The Long Distance Scouting Formation.", Erwin said pointing through the board with the picture of the new formation.

"Ohh… It's really quite extensive.", one soldier commented.

"The difference from the existing from is that each squad will be arranged into divisions. The main purpose is to enhance our scouting ability.", Erwin stated. "With soldiers spread out equally, there is a reliable range of vision in all directions. Our scouting ability and sphere of communication will be at their peak even as we advance."

"Gotcha.", Farlan said quietly. "So the advance guard serves as the eyes for the whole unit."

"By sharing the locations of titans as a unit, we can avoid the possibility of direct contact as much as possible.", Erwin said.

"Our primary method of communication will be to use this flare guns.", Erwin said holding the flare gun. "Based on the color of the smoke round that is fired, we'll be able to properly convey the situation at hand."

"It will, of course, come with some exceptions…"

"I believe the ones who will be using them the most are the front-row scouting units."

"The unit that catches sight of a titan first will fire a red flare. The units in the immediate vicinity that confirm the smoke color will then promptly set off a red flare signal of their own, continuing in turn until the message is relayed to the center.", Erwin explained. "When the signal reaches the center, the command unit will fire a green flare signal in the direction which they decide the entire unit should proceed."

"I get it now.", Farlan thought. "It's much faster than reporting by running around on horses."

"Furthermore, a black flare signal should be used-", Erwin said.

"-in the event of an emergency", [Y/N] continued telling to her squad. "Though, it'd be great if we don't have to use it all."

"Our position is here.", [Y/N] said pointing where their squad should be in the formation. "We will relay to the next row: row four."

"We'll run the spare horses side by side while focusing mainly on relay.", [Y/N] said. "However, no matter how superior this formation may be, there's no guarantee that we won't run into a titan at any given time."

"Don't forget, we're outside the walls here. We should always expect the unexpected, because anything can happen.", [Y/N] reminded. "This squad in particular lacks a sense of unity."

"Hmph", Isabel hissed.

"Then again, it's also blessed with some capable, talented people.", [Y/N] said glancing at Levi.

"Heh!", Isabel boasted folding her arms.

"If even one single unit in formation screws up, the consequences will be dire. So I want you to proceed with caution.", [Y/N] prompted.

"Yeah! It's my time to shine!", Isabel exclaimed jumping in excitement.

"I don't think you three know this but...", [Y/N] said in a low tone. "In all honesty, the situation we in the Survey Corps find ourselves in is pretty disgraceful."

"The expenses of the Survey Corps requires a lot amount of money and the scrutiny put upon the survey corps by other military branches and the center is relentless.", [Y/N] explained.

"Seriously? So I guess not everybody in the military gets along with each other.", Farlan reacted.

"It's because we still haven't been able to bring back any ground-breaking information about the titans.", [Y/N] said looking down, disappointed.

"However, one thing is for certain.", [Y/N] said holding up her fist. "The outcome of this new formation has the potential to change our future! We will absolutely make this a success and bring about a new order!"

"Yes, sir!", Isabel saluted wrongly.

Farlan and Levi just stared at Isabel and [Y/N].

"Isabel, that's not the correct salute."[Y/N] said nicely in all of a sudden, nudging a bit, Isabel's hair. "Next time, do it correctly."

[Y/N] then left the room. Isabel, Farlan and Levi was shocked on what [Y/N] did. [Y/N] was actually being nice and quite sweet all of a sudden.

 **…TimeSkip…**

[Y/N] was in her room, lying flatly on her bed, staring at ceiling. She couldn't sleep. She was worrying for the expedition tomorrow. She didn't know why.

 _'Shit. Calm the fuck down, [Y/N]. They will be fine. Your squad will be fine in tomorrow's expedition [Y/N]. With Erwin's newly planned formation, it will be much safer.'_ [Y/N] thought calming herself.

Suddenly, a realization came to her. _'The hell, why am I even worrying about my squad? Am I getting attached with them? No, not this again. Why do I always have to deal with these shitty feelings?'_

[Y/N] rolled over to her side, annoyed. _'Ugh. I already promised myself that I wouldn't get attached to anyone anymore. Is that really inevitable? Is that a really hard thing to do?'_

She blankly stared at the wall for a while, contemplating about how she got attached to other people again, no matter how many walls she tried to build to isolate herself to avoid these ' _feelings_ '.

She rolled to her other side again and closed her eyes to sleep. _'Ugh. Stupid shitty feelings in this stupid shitty life.'_

 _..._

 _ **Author's Note:** Thank you for reading everyone! ^_^ I'm really having a hard time updating here on this site. If you want to read the story further and faster, check it out here in this link. __story/6228925/Exceptions/_ _:) I'm able to update my stories on that site on time. :D the w.w.w...q.o.u.t.e.v...c.o.m.../ doesn't appear here. just remove one dots per character then add +_ _story/6228925/Exceptions as you type the link. sorry. if it's such a bother. :_


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